August ended up being a pricey month for wedding preparations between dress, photographer, and dj deposits coming at once! Even though the numbers I've been looking at on my budget are scary big (both my part and the total), I don't think it really hit me until I started transferring money out of my savings account when I've been so good about putting it in there for the past year and a half. I tried to remind myself that this is one of those "big life events" that are exactly what savings accounts exist for...which worked most of the time.
During one of my [few and far between] runs (hence why I haven't been blogging as often...), I was reflecting about my grandparents. Both of my dad's parents passed away a long time ago-when I was 6 and 16. My mom's father died a year ago January, he is survived by his second wife who I've met a total of once. My grandma's second husband passed away a couple of months ago but Alzheimers really took him from the family long before then-only Danny was kind of enough to ask after his health in the past few years (we never really liked him). My mom's mom is now the only living grandparent for either Dan or me who might make it to our wedding. However, she just got diagnosed with cancer again (same kind after over 5 years in remission...don't understand that one) and her short-term memory is almost non-existent. The good thing about that is every time she hears Dan and I are getting married she gets excited all over again. She LOVES Dan and think's he's very handsome :) Also means she doesn't remember other things like the fact that my aunt and uncle got divorced...but life's better that way, right?
Anyways, I want to acknowledge my grandparents in some way (and Dan's too, if he cares to suggest it) so I've been trying to come up with anything I could take of theirs to use on my big day. My biggest struggle with involving family heirlooms is the divorce rate in my family-my mom has 1 sibling who stayed married and her parents didn't either. So I feel weird having an emblem from anyone on her side because of that. However, my dad's side of the family has lots of long-lasting marriages, and lots of people who chose a religious vocation...perhaps these go hand in hand? As I dug through jewelry I inherited from my paternal grandmother, I came across a lot of beautiful but slightly out-of-date pieces as well as no fewer than 4 rosaries. Easy way to incorporate that part of the family-rosary somewhere in my dress or maybe wrapped around my bouquet (thanks for the idea Christine!) I also have a photo of my paternal grandparents from very early in their relationship displayed in our apartment that I hope to incorporate somehow as well.
After my fashion consultation with Elizabeth, I decided to wear my pearls for our engagement pictures next week. The necklace was a confirmation present from my dad's sister, the earrings were a confirmation present from my childhood nanny, and the bracelet made for/gifted to me by my dad's brother/my godfather out of some pearls they found at my grandmother's house. I'm so excited to be able to honor all of these wonderful people and their beautiful marriages in photos that will be documented for a long time to come!
And now coming full circle. A large portion of the money I'll be personally contributing to the wedding is a result of the sale of my car. Every time I looked at dresses or photographers, I'd think to myself what piece of the car is paying for that particular expense. Really romantic, right? I realized though, that almost half the money I used to initially purchase the car was a gift from my maternal grandfather. He was convinced he was dying several years ago and gifted us all our inheritance as our Christmas present back in 2009. I still remember talking to Erica on the phone and her mentioning that our checks from Grandpa arrived-I thought she misread where the decimal point was because they were much more than our usual Christmas present. The money was intended for my college fund but since I saved my parents so much money with scholarships (and studying abroad in Poland), they allowed me to use it to purchase a car that following summer. 2.5 years later when it was time to sell, well, I officially made the worst investment of my life, haha. An investment guaranteed to be worth less than it was initially. Nice job, Sarah.
Anyways, now instead of thinking that my dress cost as much as all the upholstery and interior decor in the car and my photographer/photos will cost as much as most of the parts under the hood, I think of them instead as being my inheritance from my grandfather. Since I haven't thought of a way to honor/remember my grandmother, I'll keep praying that her health stabilizes enough for her to attend in person, and maybe cry just a little bit that I'm taking Dan off the market!
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