The Name Game

I love Christmas cards-sending them and receiving them. Growing up, I always enjoyed reading people's annual updates and looking at the family pictures even if it was someone I didn't know or had only met once when I was very young. I did not always love assembling for our family photo because my siblings were usually impossible and, looking back, someone always had a funny haircut.

It seems that sending Christmas cards is one of those "you've finally reached adulthood" type things so I've been happy to send them to my family and close friends the past few years. Last year I made a point of writing pretty lengthy messages to most people, definitely didn't have the time this year and probably won't ever again. I was glad this year to have something to use our engagement pictures for, and collecting all those addresses for save-the-dates and invitations served a duplicate purpose which was helpful too! Dan got some good practice in stamping and licking as well-I'm sure he enjoyed that particular task :)

Not sure if anyone else had this experience, but our mail person seemed to deliver our Christmas cards in packs this year. We'd get 3 one day, none for a few days, and then another bunch. Or maybe our family and friends who sent us cards just got around to mailing them the same day, who knows. I love having new cards (now that Dan made me take down our engagement cards) and lots of pictures to hang on our fridge, but what I loved most of all this year were the envelopes!

Yes, I realize this is weird, but the one benefit of getting our cards in packs was comparing how people addressed them in this weird engagement period. Last year I don't remember seeing anything other than "Sarah Wallace and Dan Magner", or "Dan Magner and Sarah Wallace" or maybe just one of our names depending on who it was from.

This year, we got a whole variety and it was so much fun to see all the different combinations (this isn't all of them...but I think I covered all the combinations)!

When I've written our names recently (Christmas cards, save the date return address stamps, etc) I usually just write our first names and reverse the order each time and completely eliminate last names. Its weird, yes,  but two last names is too much work. You can typically tell whose friend or family member is writing to us based on which name comes first on some of the envelopes, the Sarah and Dan Magner's are each from one of our cousins and the Mr & Mrs. Magner's are both from friends. Dan's favorite is that last one with Mr. & Mrs. Magner. I was the one who got the mail and handed it to him saying that we got a card for his aunt and uncle (the only Mr. & Mrs. Magner I know). He didn't think that was very funny for some reason.

Question of the hour now--am I changing my name? If so, to what? Surprisingly, Dan's mom didn't think I would change my last name, saying it seems to be the trend not to these days. I actually think that particular trend has passed for the most part, but its all circumstantial. If I were older (i.e. more established in my career) or was marrying someone with a particularly unusual name, I think I would have kept Wallace. My mom kept her married name even after her divorce primarily for professional reasons, and the fact that for almost half her life she's been Susan Wallace, not Susan Hedrich. Dan's mom opted to change hers back. 

It's really important to Dan that I change my name, and I don't mind at all. I like the symbol of unity within our family (especially once we have children), I appreciate tradition, and frankly I like being further up in the alphabet! It will be a pain for probably a couple of years as I find more things I forgot to change my name for, but keeping my maiden name or doing a hyphenated last name could be a pain for much longer. Besides, Magner-Wallace sounds much better than Wallace-Magner and that first option just doesn't totally make sense. 

Anyways, my next struggle was with my middle name. My mom eliminated her given middle name (Provost) and took her maiden name, Hedrich as her middle name when she got married which I think is pretty common. However, I think Wallace is a weird middle name. Giving maiden names as a child's middle name is traditional in my family, but I wouldn't even subject a child of mine to that. For the record, I also think Wallace is a weird first name. I also like my middle name- Breckinridge-and its even more important to me now that my grandmother (it was her middle name too) passed away a couple of weeks ago. "B" is also a better middle initial than "W". Sarah W. Magner? No thanks!

So I decided (and this may change before I legally switch) to do what gives me the most flexibility in the future-I'll change my last name and use both my given middle name and my maiden name as middle names. Legally, I'll be Sarah Breckinridge Wallace Magner. I've been practicing my new signature (lets be honest, that's been happening for a few years now) and I haven't totally decided what I want to do yet, but thankfully I have time.

For those of you wondering how to address our wedding cards or Christmas cards next year, Mr. and Mrs. Magner is completely appropriate, and I won't try to pretend its not for us anymore. Merry Christmas everyone!!

A Proud Daughter

About a month ago, my mom announced that she was a finalist for Chicago CFO of the Year. Even though I had no clue what that involved, it sounded like a big deal and if she was excited so was I! She invited me (or really Erikson's Board of Directors invited me) to attend to the networking reception and awards ceremony. Despite grumbling about having to wear a suit, I put it on the calendar.

I approached the concierge desk at the Marriott where the event was being held and asked where to go. The concierge's response: "Just follow all those men in suits". Oh goody. I guess I shouldn't be too surprised that the event would be mostly men, still doesn't thrill me.

"Dinner" was station-based during a networking reception. Although my mother spoke to and introduced me to a number of women (including a great new contact at Aon), probably 75% of the attendees were men. Didn't take me long to realize that I should have suggested one of my single friends go instead of me!

Sitting down during the dessert/awards portion, I flipped through the program. There were a total of 30 finalists in 6 different categories: medium and large private, medium and large not-for-profit, and medium and large public companies. Of the 30 finalists, 7 were women and 5 were in my mom's category: medium sized not-for-profit company. Despite the odds, a man won her category along with all 5 other awards. Four of the six winners mentioned a wife and children in their acceptance speech. No husbands or other partners mentioned at all. I believe every winner acknowledged his wife as the one who keeps him sane and balances out a crazy work life. I wonder, if I were to make that speech someday, would I be acknowledging a husband who keeps me sane? Because Dan does. I've also been told that I wear the pants in our relationship since we were in high school...guess that's just one more way my career and lifestyle maybe more traditionally reflects a male partner than a female one.

I read my mom's acceptance speech over her shoulder. It was pretty easy despite the dim light because she typed it up big enough to be able to read without her glasses. Part of her speech, and her bio in the program, was about her dedication to mentoring young women in the finance field. The final line of her speech mentioned one of her proudest moments being when her daughter (aka me) told her that she was a great role model as a professional woman. Now, I've recently discovered that my mom likes to paraphrase what I say and I'm not certain I've ever said that to her face, although I probably should have. She is a great role model as a successful female professional, although for many years I held a different opinion on her mothering skills and I'm still working through that one.

Needless to say, I was annoyed by the end of the evening and my mom was pretty shocked as well to see a full roster of male winners. I don't think its a reflection of the women in the CFO position not being good enough to qualify, but probably rather the lack of women in a CFO position period. My mom acknowledges that she feels very isolated at this point in her career being one of the few women her age in that kind of professional position. Her peers in the workforce are less likely to be at that level because so many of them took time off to have kids-"the mommy track". She wonders if it will  be the same way when I'm her age.

More than at any other point in my life, last night made me to want to be a CFO-a career that I've never, ever considered. Not because I think its a super cool job, it isn't, but just because I know that I could be good enough to deserve to win one of those categories. Believe me, I think my mom is too and probably any number of other female CFOs as well.

I'm interested to see how I reflect back on last night after I finish reading Lean In and participate in the Aon women's network bookclub on it next Thursday. Maybe I'll set a personal record for blogging twice in a week!

A Big Thank You!

It has been a whirlwind few weeks for me. The madness started at my dad's birthday dinner on August 31st. My brother, Mark, started taking classes at DePaul so my mom was reviewing her benefits to see what they had to do so he could take classes for free. In doing this, she discovered that I still qualified to take graduate level classes there for half-price so long as I registered for them before my 26th birthday. On September 6th, I celebrated my 25th...a year left and counting. I've always intended to get my MBA, I was actually planning to start classes next fall, probably at DePaul. The prospect of saving what would come to $12,000 was too good to pass up so clearly I had to speed up my timeline a bit!

Talking to Christine, my Alpha Chi big sister, in mid-September, we reviewed my plan for the next month. I had to start and finish my DePaul application including 2 recommendation letters and 2 essays by October 1st. I had to register for, study, and take the GMAT shortly thereafter. I wanted to mail my save-the-dates by the 9 month mark (September 21st). This super killer treasury project was FINALLY going live on October 1st. I had to shop for bridesmaid dresses when my maid of honor was in town October 8th-12th. I was getting my wisdom teeth out on October 10th. Then everything else...2 formal events on back-to-back Fridays, starting a new tutoring program I'm piloting for Big Shoulders Fund, assorted other commitments...

On the plus side, Christine didn't feel nearly as overwhelmed by her September 17th deadline anymore!

I am proud to say, that as of October 18th, I've completed all of the above and more. Once again. I have to say I am so incredibly grateful to my supportive friends, family, and coworkers! My manager and the VP of our group commented I was going to be pretty damn busy come January, but never once discouraged me from applying and wrote/submitted my recommendation letters ahead of schedule during a super busy time at work for us all. My friend Amanda was awesome about reviewing my essays on short-notice since I have totally forgotten how to write anything other than business emails and blog posts (thankfully I rediscovered those skills prior to the GMAT). My sister, Erica, and Dan were rockstar save-the-date stuffers and lickers (and thanks to my mom for letting me use her printer!) My local bridesmaids were super flexible about dedicating 2 weekday evenings in a row to bridesmaid dress shopping, didn't mind that I was doing GMAT flashcards on my phone in between dress showings on Tuesday, and gave wisdom teeth advise while we walked around on Wednesday (2 of them had been to the same dentist I was heading to, and all 3 of them got theirs out a normal age). Allison and Erica were snack packing pros for those outings as well!

As much as I dreaded the GMAT, I totally kicked ass getting a 690 overall score (lets not talking about that 50 percentile math score) and just a little more than 2 weeks after submitting my application I got my acceptance letter from DePaul! Of course with my score I'm starting to wonder if I'm selling myself short by not applying to a more difficult school, but I'll work through that soon.

Most importantly, Dan was there through literally everything. Stuffing envelopes, pretending to be interested in bridesmaid dresses, reviewing my essays, easily sleeping through alarm clocks at 2am so I could work with the developers, doing engagement pictures while sick, being my date and for one evening, my purse, practicing football with me so I'm not completely worthless, driving to freaking Addison to look at limos instead of playing GTA V, letting me win the towel color for our registry...I mean everything. Let's not even talk about the whole wisdom teeth situation-I'm not sure Dan's ever been more desperate to leave the apartment. I'll admit that I was crying day 1 because I didn't want to drink my food anymore. In my mind, I'm some diminished version of superwoman, but in reality I would be nothing without everyone who's standing with me. I'm sure this past month is just a very small snapshot of how much I'll be relying on them between January and June!

Budgets and Grandparents

August ended up being a pricey month for wedding preparations between dress, photographer, and dj deposits coming at once! Even though the numbers I've been looking at on my budget are scary big (both my part and the total), I don't think it really hit me until I started transferring money out of my savings account when I've been so good about putting it in there for the past year and a half. I tried to remind myself that this is one of those "big life events" that are exactly what savings accounts exist for...which worked most of the time.

During one of my [few and far between] runs (hence why I haven't been blogging as often...), I was reflecting about my grandparents. Both of my dad's parents passed away a long time ago-when I was 6 and 16. My mom's father died a year ago January, he is survived by his second wife who I've met a total of once. My grandma's second husband passed away a couple of months ago but Alzheimers really took him from the family long before then-only Danny was kind of enough to ask after his health in the past few years (we never really liked him). My mom's mom is now the only living grandparent for either Dan or me who might make it to our wedding. However, she just got diagnosed with cancer again (same kind after over 5 years in remission...don't understand that one) and her short-term memory is almost non-existent. The good thing about that is every time she hears Dan and I are getting married she gets excited all over again. She LOVES Dan and think's he's very handsome :) Also means she doesn't remember other things like the fact that my aunt and uncle got divorced...but life's better that way, right?

Anyways, I want to acknowledge my grandparents in some way (and Dan's too, if he cares to suggest it) so I've been trying to come up with anything I could take of theirs to use on my big day. My biggest struggle with involving family heirlooms is the divorce rate in my family-my mom has 1 sibling who stayed married and her parents didn't either. So I feel weird having an emblem from anyone on her side because of that. However, my dad's side of the family has lots of long-lasting marriages, and lots of people who chose a religious vocation...perhaps these go hand in hand? As I dug through jewelry I inherited from my paternal grandmother, I came across a lot of beautiful but slightly out-of-date pieces as well as no fewer than 4 rosaries. Easy way to incorporate that part of the family-rosary somewhere in my dress or maybe wrapped around my bouquet (thanks for the idea Christine!) I also have a photo of my paternal grandparents from very early in their relationship displayed in our apartment that I hope to incorporate somehow as well.
After my fashion consultation with Elizabeth, I decided to wear my pearls for our engagement pictures next week. The necklace was a confirmation present from my dad's sister, the earrings were a confirmation present from my childhood nanny, and the bracelet made for/gifted to me by my dad's brother/my godfather out of some pearls they found at my grandmother's house. I'm so excited to be able to honor all of these wonderful people and their beautiful marriages in photos that will be documented for a long time to come!

And now coming full circle. A large portion of the money I'll be personally contributing to the wedding is a result of the sale of my car. Every time I looked at dresses or photographers, I'd think to myself what piece of the car is paying for that particular expense. Really romantic, right? I realized though, that almost half the money I used to initially purchase the car was a gift from my maternal grandfather. He was convinced he was dying several years ago and gifted us all our inheritance as our Christmas present back in 2009. I still remember talking to Erica on the phone and her mentioning that our checks from Grandpa arrived-I thought she misread where the decimal point was because they were much more than our usual Christmas present. The money was intended for my college fund but since I saved my parents so much money with scholarships (and studying abroad in Poland), they allowed me to use it to purchase a car that following summer. 2.5 years later when it was time to sell, well, I officially made the worst investment of my life, haha. An investment guaranteed to be worth less than it was initially. Nice job, Sarah.

Anyways, now instead of thinking that my dress cost as much as all the upholstery and interior decor in the car and my photographer/photos will cost as much as most of the parts under the hood, I think of them instead as being my inheritance from my grandfather. Since I haven't thought of a way to honor/remember my grandmother, I'll keep praying that her health stabilizes enough for her to attend in person, and maybe cry just a little bit that I'm taking Dan off the market!

Amazing Support aka Dress Shopping!

Its been a whirlwind week for me. Dan's been out of town since last Sunday-the longest we've been apart since we moved in together (1 year as of August 11th, isn't it crazy?!), which makes everything else both easier and harder. I've had an easier time getting stuff done, and by stuff I mean working seemingly nonstop. Its been an absolutely crazy week at work what with trying to coordinate testing for 100+ people and feeling other pieces of the project (you know, the part that I've been pretty much singularly working on for the past 13 months) slip through my fingers a little bit more each day. I ended up working from home two days this week just to maintain my cool. It was a pretty effective strategy except that Piper is MAKING ME NUTS!!! I'm pretty sure she's suffering from separation anxiety with Dan gone although she definitely didn't do this last time he was out of town. Sometimes its cute and she curls up next to me in bed-like literally make me move closer to the middle so she has room-but then she'll occasionally bite me for no reason and my allergies have been awful. She's also the pickiest former alley cat ever. She has to have canned food, and not just any canned food, but no longer eats pate or sliced meat, it has to be shredded. Ridiculous.

Enough about the cat, although look out for Facebook album titled "I have a problem with taking pictures of my cat" shortly because I need to delete them from my phone.

Bordering this hell-week was dress shopping!! Our first trip was to David's Bridal a week ago Monday. I figured it was a good place to start since I could easily browse everything online and had a wide selection. I brought my mom, Dan's mom, and my champ wedding-dress-picture-taking-bridesmaid Laura! Pretty surreal experience trying on a dress for the first time if I do say so myself, and I really liked the ones I found there. However, with the ridiculous amount of money going into this wedding I couldn't wrap my mind around buying a dress that cost just a little more than our per headcount cost for the reception so knew I'd keep looking.

Trip two was kind of last minute, but since I had to drive Dan down to work on Sunday to go on his little trip I made an appointment at Eva's Bridal in Oak Lawn. The first dress I came out in, my mom made a face and told me to take it off but it ended up being one of mine (and her) favorites. There was definitely a huge selection and we barely looked through half of it during our appointment time, but ended up finding 2 very different dresses that I adored! Buying on impulse/during an early shopping trip might work for some people, but I knew I wouldn't be prepared to purchase on just my second trip so we made another appointment to come back the following Sunday. So far Eva's was winning...

The appointment I was most excited about was today at a local wedding boutique in Lincoln Park. I've only heard great reviews about Weddings 826 and I pass by it all the time so to say that I was a little eager is definitely an understatement. They have a manageable selection of gowns and give you the opportunity to order or buy from the rack. It was exactly the experience I had been imagining-we were offered champagne, water, or tea and had a nice room with all the dresses and curtains that pulled together for the changing room. I was once again accompanied by my wedding-dress-picture-taking-and-editing-bridesmaid, my mom, and even dragged my sister into it by letting her spend time with Piper beforehand. Fell in love with another 2 dresses (my magic number) which were very similar in style but had subtle differences that I couldn't possibly decide between today.

After making a pit stop to browse invitations at All She Wrote (love shopping locally!!), hitting up the olive oil store, having lunch, and buying up half of Nordstrom Rack's junior's section (for my sister...I got some awesome new red heels, and a super cute dress that will probably be my shower dress for only $20!), we made it to Macy's bridal salon. Now, being a born and bred Chicagoan, I have a little bit of an issue with the whole Macy's buying out Marshall Field's situation but they do have dresses that aren't available in any other stores locally so thought I'd give it a shot. Have to say the experience was not as impressive considering what we'd been through in the morning. Less drink selections, multiple brides sharing the same mirror/viewing platform, could only see about 20 dresses displayed, but thankfully I had done my research and brought a large selection of pictures. Unfortunately, I guess a lot of the dresses I pulled are from the new season and they didn't have them in stock yet. Regardless, I did manage to find another 2 dresses, of course! They were actually similar to each other but different from the two similar ones I liked at Weddings 826. I think I actually managed to narrow it down to one, but its so hard to really know you like the dress when there are alterations in how I'd have it ordered. The one I really liked I'd be getting rid of some of the beading and ordering in a different color. Similarly, the ones I liked before I would be taking some of the poof out and one dress would be a different color.

So tomorrow will be repeat trip to Eva's Bridal. I was able to find all the dresses I liked today online (and took pics at the first salon) so I have a visual to compare to and Eva's might have the ones from Weddings 826 as well (although I'd rather buy at the place nearby just for convenience). The dresses I liked at Eva's last week are pretty dissimilar but each one is like one of the pairs I liked today. Hoping I can make a better decision on what I love tomorrow!

After the excitement of the day/in preparation for Dan coming home tomorrow I ended up staying in tonight which worked out perfectly since I finished the third book in a series my mom wants to borrow-yes, a real, live paperback book! I may have bought a few books (like 30ish) in the past week so gotta put those away before Dan comes home!

Really, the whole point of this post before I went on a really excited wedding dress tangent, was to talk about the unbelievable support we've gotten in the first 2 months of the planning process. We truly have the most amazing friends and family. I've been meaning to do this post for awhile with this picture-but I'm glad I procrastinated because we got 2 more cards this week!

Obviously I rearranged a little to get all of these in one picture, but our fridge is filling up with best wishes from the people who have waited just as long for this step as we have :) In case I don't say it enough-thank you, thank you, thank you to all of you! I'm thrilled that everyone accepted my invitation to be a part of our wedding party including the ringbearer and flowergirl I just asked last week! Well, technically my dad asked the ring bearer's mom but I got a very excited call from my aunt at 7:30 am last Monday and sent him some diving rings to "practice" with! My flowergirl totally made my day by emailing me saying that she's excited to be part of the wedding and loves her tank top! Even Dan's been awesome in helping make wedding decisions such as the colors, the photographer, the videographer, choosing a website design, and ruling out any dresses he won't marry me in! Now he's got a 5 item to-do list to complete before the 10 month mark so we'll see how that goes!

Special shout-out to everyone who's been hanging in there with me during this week. As much as I miss Dan and the fact that even a hug from him makes life a little bit more tolerable, I have such a great support circle! Laura, Dan L, and Kristen have been fielding text messages/gchats/lync messages from me the past few weeks that involve requests to drink, virtual screams, death threats,  and sometimes just strings of letters from me banging on my keyboard like this "hdoiaf;lksafds". I also had "date nights" with my second and third favorite Dans (although depending on the day, they might be in first place!) which were awesome and things I need to make time for more often. A phone convo with Melissa was long overdue and I know I have others to catch up with too! Would have given Erica anything she wanted for letting me sleep through the night/feeding Piper at 5:30 this morning even though I was a horrible Wedding Friday date. After lots of girly bonding time today, its date night with my dad tomorrow just before I get to see my Dan again! By the way, thanks parents of the late 80s/early 90s--they really all had to be Daniel didn't they?!

A New Transition

I've spent the last month or so trying to figure out what to do with this blog. Officially, the transition I started writing the blog about is complete and we've now moved onto a new one. I'd have to say our first transition was pretty successful. We managed to eliminate the remaining 700ish miles between us at the beginning of August and went from being separated by half the country to sharing a bed every night. Not that there haven't been plenty of bumps along the way-Dan didn't have a job when we signed the lease which was one of the scariest things I've ever done; the chore chart was doomed from the moment I hung it on the refrigerator; we've discovered annoying habits about each other like how particular Dan is about the way to hang toilet paper/paper towel rolls and my tendency to have up to 5 pairs of shoes lined up next to the bed instead of in the closet; I had more than one fit over not being engaged, and Dan put up with 2+ hour commutes on more than one occasion after working a 10-hour day just to live where I want to. 

Despite all of the craziness, we've learned so much about each other from living together for the past 11 months and I'm incredibly grateful that we made the leap. And, although I may or may not ever admit this to Dan, I lucked out with him not proposing soon enough to have my dream September 7th, 2013 wedding date seeing as my work project go-live is probably getting pushed back to September 9th...sometimes fate works out in our favor!

Now, the real fun begins! I attempted to take some time to enjoy the fact that we were [finally] engaged, but that probably only lasted about 3 days before I started cracking down more on wedding planning. Well, actually, I made my mom buy wedding magazines the day after Dan proposed so I can't really claim I waited that long but still, I tried. So we had the really fun conversation aka the budget talk with my parents just a few days later, which led into the next logical conversation-guest list!! Apparently my dad thought I was crazy as he just asked a fellow Ascension mom today if her daughter had requested a guest list within a week of the proposal. Anyways, guest list is what drives the expense and good thing we addressed it early on since my mom listed 64 people she wanted to invite to my 200 person wedding. And no, that did not include her or my siblings. So much for that suggested 20 people per parent limit....

As soon as I got that news, I knew I'd desperately need some saner people to help me get through the next year. First wedding DIY: bridesmaid ask gifts! After some thorough research (aka time spent on pinterest), I determined exactly how I wanted to ask them-as shown in pictures at the bottom! I got inspiration from a number of blogs and pins-for reference feel free to check my bridesmaids board, they're all on there!

Since half of my bridesmaids live out of state, they got their presents in some ugly boxes and I'm sure my attempt at wrapping everything nicely inside didn't make it during the trip to Nashville, Hilton Head, and Arlington. Sorry ladies! I also had to alter the margarita pouch/margarita glass for my sister since she's only 15 so she got her favorite Arizona Iced tea an some random yellow cup. Yes, I did attempt to match the scrapbook paper on the outside of the bags to the cup to the margaritas. My favorite part of the ask gifts though were the shirts. You can order these online for somewhere between $15-20 but I absolutely hate paying for shipping and I wanted them like now, so I decided to make them! It required trips to 2 different Michael's stores to purchase all the glittery letters they had (sorry to any other Chicago crafters who wanted iron-on silver glitter letters). Piper also found a new source of amusement through knocking the letters off the counter as I was trying to iron them on, I just found a B underneath our oven when I was cleaning yesterday. Its probably the B for my Bride tank top that I'm going to try to convince Allison-my amazing MOH-to make for me :)The backs of the shirts have the year I met each bridesmaid, which only Allison and Elizabeth guessed when the first saw them-good job :) Totally photo op for bachelorette party/wedding morning prep! I also wrote a note to everyone to include in the package. Half the group laughed and the other half cried when reading them, which is good because I'll definitely be needing some company to cry with me and make me laugh throughout this year and on the big day!

Anyways, clearly I'm really excited about the bridesmaid presents and procrastinating doing other things like working on my personal and my wedding budget now that we've got the prices for the church. So I'll leave you all with some pictures! And a warning-this will probably turn into a wedding progress blog so I would love to have you along for this next transition but I understand if its not your thing-thanks for reading!!

2,371 Days

Last week Dan told me were going out for dinner this past Thursday night. He refused to tell me where we were going or anything about it other than dinner is at 8 and I need to be ready by 7:15. I don't really do well with surprises, unless I don't know about them....if that makes any sense. So I kept trying to get more information out of him. I found out we could either take the el or drive there so I figured it must be in the city because 45 minutes wouldn't give us enough time to get to Evanston or Oak Park for dinner on the train. I also found out there was a dress code-only nice jeans and no gym shoes, that sort of thing.

Just to be prepared, I had to get my nails done on Wednesday night so I got my first ever no-chip manicure. I was pretty sure the big day was going to be sometime over the weekend and I needed to be prepared, obviously (my mom taught me well!)

By Thursday afternoon I had a pretty good guess of where we were going. Dan said he hadn't been there before and it wasn't a recommendation from someone else. I deduced it must be a pretty well known, dressy, place. I had picked out my outfit the night before, had just enough time (now that I'm working 7:30-4:30....) to go to muscle max and get ready by my 7:15 deadline. I was, astonishingly, only 2 minutes late. And I told Dan I would have been on time if he hadn't made me change the laundry. So I'm putting my coat on by the door, and see Dan tying his shoe. I kinda looked at him funny because every time he jokes about proposing to me he says he's going to be pretending to tie his shoe and just pull out a ring box. And that's pretty much what happened. "While I'm down here I may as well kill 2 birds with one stone, right?" After a little more chitchat and him convincing me I actually needed to walk down the hall so I wasn't just staring at him from the doorway, he said those magic words that I've been waiting to hear for, well, about 2,371 days "Sarah Breckinridge Wallace, will you marry me?". And he opened up the box of the EXACT ring I've been sending him links of for about the past year. Better yet, he caught it all on camera :)

I had this master plan of how/when I was going to tell everyone about our engagement, which of course didn't get followed. Somebody was too excited and got texts all through dinner asking him how it went. I didn't let him reply, so officially our waitress at the Signature Room (exactly where I thought we were going-Dan was kind of disappointed I guessed but I said its just proof of how well I know him) was the first person I told we were engaged....but I called my mom after dinner and my dad after that who was in the car with Danny and Erica and my grand plan generally went downhill from there.

So, now that everyone I need to tell by phone call, text, or in person (minus work...working from home on Friday got me out of that situation until Tuesday!) is complete-you, my wonderful and dedicated blog readers are next on the list! Facebook status will be changed shortly-the last step!

Surviving a Long Weekend Alone

A few days ago my friend Kelsey texted me asking for long-distance relationship advice. I think its probably hard to give advice that works for everyone, but I let her know what worked for Dan and me.

"Keep busy, stay in contact daily even if its just texts but don't make a set time commitment like you have to facetime at 9am every night for an hour or you'll feel trapped, at the same time have something you can count on like Dan and I always sent each other the same text every night before we went to sleep". (Can you tell I was rushing to get to a meeting as I wrote that? Total run on sentence)

Kelsey said it was the best advise she's heard so far, which is good because after 5 years I should be something of an expert :) It also helped that Dan and I reused some of those long-distance skills more recently when he took a trip to North Dakota for 5 days to visit friends still up in the tundra.

For me, keeping busy was key in college and still is. Thursday evening I did my mother's day shopping and went out to a UofR dinner. Just like at college, had to invite a friend since my "guest" was 600+ miles away. Thanks to Dan L for joining me for that event for the second year in a row! Friday I spent time with my friend Elizabeth who predates Dan by about 12 years. We participated in a club crawl which was a lot of fun, minus someone picking up her coat my mistake but that's all fixed now. That's definitely an event Dan wouldn't have wanted to go to had he been around, so it worked out okay. Plus with Friday night soccer starting again, I'm always left to fend for myself on Fridays. I spent Saturday at a church retreat which I regretted signing up for by the end of a busy week but I'm so glad I went! It was nice to have some time for reflection and I met some new people who I look forward to spending more time with at young adult Catholic events. Then came Mother's Day-my favorite day of the year (not) ! After spending last mother's day in North Dakota for Dan's graduation, the one before at my graduation, and the previous two working, it was nice to have some Wallace family bonding time. Let me tell you, I make an awesome asparagus goat cheese frittata even if it takes a couple hours....

Honestly by the time that whirlwind of a weekend was over, I didn't have a lot of time to miss Dan with few exceptions. I had to clean Piper's litter box for the first time so that was a new adventure-even used the vacuum to clean up her mess, not sure I've actually used our vacuum before. But, I am happy to say that both Piper and our two plants survived 5 days with just me. Piper may have gone about 16 hours between feedings once, and I accidentally flooded the plant which led to water spilling all over the bookcase, but those are minor details. It was also a shock to realize that throwing my tupperware in the sink after work didn't result in them magically moving to the dishwasher, and if I wanted laundry done I had to do it myself. Since our heat turned off May 1st, it was a little chilly at night without someone to cuddle with....but there was also no one to shut the blinds or windows when I wanted them open during the day. Dan, you'll be happy to know that I did not revert to leaving the lid on the toilet up, you've trained me well.

I did find us falling into old habits during our time apart. Dan's teddy bear was his co-pilot on the drive, and mine snuggled with me at night. We resumed our before-bed text but didn't stay committed to any other communication. Although I didn't want to interrupt his time with friends, I was a little disappointed to not get a phone call the whole weekend. I don't really remember calling him on my trip to Richmond though, so maybe I just got what was coming :)

Anyways, I was proud of myself for remembering how to live alone, haha, even if it wasn't super fun the whole time. To make up for it, we've got a busy weekend doing our spring cleaning this weekend and lots of social activities together next weekend! So excited that Dan's done working Saturday's for a few months!

Taking Suggestions

Yesterday was probably one of the best Friday nights I've had in awhile. Dan and I finally bit the bullet and decided to get cable (I convinced him to stay in our apartment another year which saves us anywhere from $200-$500 a month depending where we decided to move...so we splurged on $50 a month for cable). On Wednesday, Dan mentioned that if the weather was good he would be working late Thursday, Friday, AND Saturday this weekend so I decided he needed to get cable for me first since I had nothing else going on. So yesterday was the first Friday since college that I sat down and watched 3 straight hours of Friday Bride Day on TLC and it was amazing. Too bad the weather was crappy and Dan ended up being home and having to put up with it too....oh well. The only thing that might have made it better would be having Melissa sitting next to me and judging too.

I've gone back and forth over the past year with loving Say Yes to the Dress, Four Weddings, and etc...mainly depending how upset I am about the lack of engagement/delay in my life plan. I'm clearly in a good place right now, mainly because I'm about 90% certain there is a ring hiding somewhere in the 600 sq ft surrounding me as we speak.

Thankfully Dan and I are being good-natured about the pending engagement. His new favorite game is trying to get me to find the ring. The other night I fell asleep really early and when we were talking the next morning he commented "You know I was going to propose to you last night but you fell asleep too early". His coworkers are trying to convince him that the only way he'll be able to surprise me with an engagement is if he proposes while I'm in the bathroom. So, as a little bit of payback, I'd love to get my readers' opinions on the following:

1. Proposal suggestions for Dan that don't involve a toilet (they also need be better than him taking me flying for the first time on New Year's Eve to see the fireworks over the lakefront-he set the bar high for himself!

2. Suggestions as to where in my apartment the ring is (I'm not actively searching yet....but you never know when I'll get bored!)

3. Tips for Dan's conversation with my dad to ask his permission. He's (Dan) horrified at the prospect of this but he's got it pretty easy: my dad doesn't own a gun and hasn't shot one probably as long as I've been alive, Dan's taller than him and can definitely outrun him, and my dad will probably start crying so it can't be that bad, right? Although my dad will likely retell the story whenever the occasion arrives so that's a little scary!

Feel free to comment on here or find one of us on facebook to throw out your opinion :)

Our First Flight!

Our amazing New Years Eve celebration was the first time I ever flew with Dan, but the first commercial flight we ever took together was this recent trip to Boston. Its pretty crazy we've been dating for over 6 years and haven't flown together yet, but since all of our flights have been to visit each other or meet someplace there just hasn't been the opportunity. I like to think of our trip to Boston as our first vacation together, although that's not totally accurate. We met in Minneapolis over labor day in 2011, but I think of it as more a meeting point/middle ground than a vacation per say. We also spent a weekend in DC when Dan came to visit me once, but that seemed different too.

Dan's best friend from high school aka the reason we're dating (thanks Logan!) moved to Boston after graduating college and they haven't seen in each other in probably 3 or 4 years now. Its been awhile. I've been trying to think of a way for them to see each other for awhile, and unbelievably no one wants to go on spring break to Boston so it was a really cheap trip! Only cost about $600 for 2 flights and a hotel room for 3 nights!

This was also the first new state we've ever visited together, and there probably aren't too many more of them-besides the rest of the northeast. Dan's family tended to take outdoorsy vacations to places out west mainly whereas my family is definitely full of city/historical/internet-accessible dwellers so we stuck to the east coast where my dad's family is from or anything within driving distance of Chicago (read: Galena, Wisconsin Dells, or Door County almost every summer). In short story, we didn't overlap very much. After visiting Boston though, I can't believe it took me 24 years to get there-I fell in love. If only it were about 1000 miles southwest I would move there in a heartbeat.

Boston had everything I could dream of in someplace I'd want to live. It was walkable, had a train that went seemingly everywhere, lots of historical sights, a bustling downtown, and cute surrounding neighborhoods. Nothing I didn't like-except for maybe all the hills. Can't imagine I'd do a lot of running there after growing up in the midwest!

After an hour flight delay (which I was pretty annoyed with but by the time we were coming home seemed like no big deal) we met up Logan's sister-Steph-at the airport and then Logan came to get us. Saturday was spent pretty much aimlessly wandering the city before meeting Logan's friends for dinner. And his friends were so much fun! Yet another reason why I wish Boston were closer to Chicago-great people! 

On Sunday after church Logan took us over to meet the religious brothers he lives with which was a whole different side to this Chreaster kid I knew in high school, but we only shared a few embarrassing stories. We drove up the coast to Rockport, a small town that was definitely geared towards summer tourists but still had lots of cute shops for us to wander around and delicious New England clam chowder. We headed back to the city to tour Harvard Yard courtesy of my trip advisor travel guide app and then met up with another high school friend, Ellen, for dinner. Mini OPRF reunion! Too bad Ellen lives only 2.5 hours away from me in Madison but we had to go all the way to Boston (she happened to be there visiting her sister) in order to see each other for the first time in 9 months!

Monday was our big super tourist day since Logan went back to work. Freedom Trail aka hours of walking!! Maybe not the ideal thing to do when its 30 degrees and windy but whatever, we've from Chicago so we're pretty tough! Only major downside was that some of the attractions (Paul Revere's house, the USS Constitution) were closed on Mondays during the off season. We also stopped for lunch in the North End at this awesome little hole-in-the-wall pizza place recommended by my trip adviser app. It was delicious and cheap-what could be better? Logan met us over at the Prudential center after work and drove past Fenway which Dan majorly failed to take any pictures of. Pizza  (yes, more pizza) and beer/wine in the hotel room was the perfect ending to our second (and last) full day in the city.

Tuesday brought more adventures. There was a huge snow storm expected in Chicago, so I was on my phone almost the entire day refreshing our flight, making Dan look at airport weather, trying to figure out what to do. We went to the aquarium in the morning by Steph's request. I wasn't feeling to well and was stressed out about this flight thing so I'm sure I didn't exhibit the expected amount of enthusiasm (I also don't really like animals....) but I found some great gifts at the giftshop! I replaced a shark toy that Danny lost awhile ago. I called him to see what he wanted and shockingly enough he answered! I also bought this amazing Harry Otter shirt for Kelly which was pretty much the best thing ever since it combined her 2 favorite things. And I got a new key chain for myself. Its a penguin, which is kind of mine and Dan's animal mascot you could say after we saw them courting a few years ago at the Shedd aquarium and later discovered that they're one of the only animals who mates for life.

Around noon I started getting even more concerned about this flight situation. It still hadn't been cancelled which I couldn't believe so I tried calling American Airlines but my wait time was 30 minutes which just wasn't going to cut it. We decided to just head to the airport with Steph who had like a 5pm flight to our 8pm. I figured once we got to the airport we could probably hop on an earlier flight. When I asked the ticket person if we could change the flight he said it would cost $80 each because apparently they hadn't given the go-ahead to change flights due to weather yet. It was online so that was BS but whatever. Once we went through security I called AA and got through right away and was able to change to the 530pm flight home. We were only delayed about 15 minutes which astonished me given how many flights to O'Hare were cancelled. Boarded the plane, closed the door, and then an announcement saying O'Hare closed all but 1 runway and we're delayed for take-off until 9 or something. Everyone gets off the plane, they keep us updated with announcements every hour or so. We're able to board a little after 8, takeoff around 845 and land around 1030. Dan's mom was supposed to pick us up from the airport but I just told him that we'd take a cab and to let her know since our landing time was unpredictable at best. I'm sure that was the right move although spending the extra money after that horrible day didn't make things any better. I was beyond grateful to be sleeping in my own bed that night though, that's for sure.

So, our first real vacation together was overall a great experience. It was good to know that we could spend 4 days together without being apart longer than the time it took to shower. Dan also managed to keep me somewhat calmish all day Tuesday when I was caught between the stress of the flight situation and PMS. I'm sure that was one of his favorite days (sort of...) I also think I prefer the strategy of meeting Dan in our destination because he ALWAYS has bad luck with flights and I've only had a few instances despite flying (commercially) a lot more than he has. Pictures are on facebook!

Life is a game, play it.

Life has been one of my favorite games for a long time, and I'm just now remembering, its the game Dan and I played on our first date back on November 25th, 2006 (His one concession to forcing me to eat dinner with his family and watch USC crush Notre Dame that night).

The one thing I dislike about Life though, is that it frequently causes me to relive one of my fears-having children. Its not the idea of having kids of my own that scares me, I desperately want to have a family-a big one if possible. Its the reality of the actually having children that is more terrifying. I'm not talking about the being pregnant/giving birth thing (although after reading too many of my cousin's "things no one tells you about giving birth" pins on pinterest that whole ordeal is a lot scarier), its the actually being able to get pregnant and the aftermath that is more scary. It took my parents a long time to get pregnant with me, they were actually beginning to process of adoption when my mom found out she was pregnant-after about 3 years of trying. It was clearly easier with my brothers seeing as we're all the desired 2 years apart.  So the ability to get pregnant part is terrifying, but then I also start to think about the genes that I likely carry. Autism is undoubtedly genetically linked, but we don't know exactly how. One theory is that its through the father, but my dad and his sister both have autistic children so that's not necessarily true in our family. I definitely believe in the idea of a sliding scale of Autism, so its a matter of how severe whatever Autistic traits are in the genes I carry versus what Dan has (no history of Autism in his family so that's positive). Even scarier than Autism though is the history of mental illness that runs in both of our families. Honestly I think my parents will tell you its been harder to raise my non-Autistic brother over the last 15 years than it has my Autistic brother. There is a lot more uncertainty and lack of control I think with mental illness than with Autism, and uncertainty is number 2 on my things I'm afraid of list (number 1 being failure).

So back to our game. The first picture below is how I ended up retiring. I started off in college, became a salesperson earning 100K every payday, got married, was (un?)lucky enough to draw the mobile home card which was cheap, but I could have actually afforded something a little nicer this time. Just like in almost every game of life I play, I managed to skip over every single baby space save the first "baby girl" space. After my midlife crisis of becoming a teacher and taking an $80,000 pay cut (at least the mobile home made more sense), I retired at Millionaire Acres with $2.98 million after cashing in my life chips. Dan's life however, was pretty different. He graduated college and decided to become an accountant (ironic given my family's careers and the fact that I'm in charge of the bills here) who earns $60k, good starting salary-right Melissa?! Too bad promotions don't exist. He also got married and drew the very acceptable Log Cabin house card. And then the kids came....and kept coming....twin girls (his gender choice) followed by a girl and another girl and finally a boy (they just had to keep trying to get a boy!) He also retired at Millionaire Acres to try to give me a run for my money (haha), but only ended up with $1.905 million.

I won the game by a landslide...but did I really? If you ask me, I'd much rather have Dan's life.

Being Catholic

One of my newer hobbies is looking at Amazon's top 100 free books list every few days. There is a new self-publishing industry on there for ebooks that is thriving and honestly I've enjoyed some of the books I've gotten on there as much as some traditionally published books I've read. Now, I'm pretty much just looking at the romance books on there-which there is a wide selection of. Yes, minus my book club book of the month I'm pretty much sticking to short love stories with happy endings and occasional steamy scenes. Its pretty rare that I can't predict the conclusion within the first 10 pages but I'm totally okay with that. Even in normal books I tend to read the end first so nothing new there! Can't say its great literature or necessarily mentally stimulating (although in other ways...) but I read for entertainment and entertainment it is!

I downloaded a book called "Angela's Song" a few weeks ago. The summary described it basically as a young widowed woman trying to move on with her kids after her husband's recent death, and finding love again. Okay, I can do that. What I didn't know until I started reading it, is that its a book written by and about a very devout Catholic. I was raised Catholic and still attend church almost every week, but this was a type of Catholicism I've never seen in person. I'm talking daily Mass attending, very modest clothes wearing, natural family planning, and no kissing before marriage type of Catholicism. Honestly I'm not sure I realized that kind of Catholicism existed-it seemed more like an Evangelical or Mormon faith practice than the Catholic one I'm familiar with.

What would certainly have turned off many readers (at least my fellow Fifty Shades fans), actually drew in my curiosity. I began a deeper exploration of my own faith, and religion as a concept, in college. Not necessarily in the spiritual sense, but in the intellectual sense. I'm fascinated what religion prompts individuals and groups of people to do. It amazes me how people who profess to belong to the same group "Roman Catholic" can live the faith so differently. The priests at Ascension and St. Clements regularly remind us to live our faith not only on Sunday during Mass but throughout our daily lives, but even in living our faiths, they're not expecting Dan and I to bless each other before making love. Yes, that is exactly what happens in this book, after the couple is married, of course. The man is a 40-something year old virgin, for real.

It was and still is important to me to marry a Catholic guy-one of the many items on my checklist that Dan meets. But even the way we practice our faith is very different. He's a once-a-year (or maybe more depending if I'm mad at him for something) church goer, which is okay. What is important to me is being able to bring up my children in a shared faith-with both their parents as role models-so I'm letting him off the hook now...knowing he'll have many years of weekly Mass attendance coming his way.

Although I'm nowhere near making the move to align my lifestyle like the characters in Angela's Song, the book did compel me to think more about my body in a spiritual sense. I've never really done that before, besides thinking about whether my knees were bothering me too much to kneel for an extended period of time. I happened to read this book close to the beginning of Lent, for which I needed to come up with something to "give up". Basically think of this as a second chance New Years resolution for Catholics that you only have to commit to for 6 weeks. For years I did some variation of giving up sweets, which made me feel much better for 40 days but I always reverted back to my normal habits. Last year I decided to work on avoiding sloth (one of the seven deadly sins as my AXO sisters can attest to!) by not hitting the snooze button on my alarm clock during the work week. Also didn't stick, but at least now I know I'm capable of doing it if I put my mind to it.

Every year I hear the same mini lecture from the priest at Ash Wednesday prayer service or Mass talking about how we don't need to "give up" something, we could do something instead. And if we do choose to give up something, we shouldn't brag about it or even tempt other people to say what they're doing by asking them. Granted, I got an email from Allison on Ash Wednesday morning asking me what I was giving up, so didn't avoid that temptation very well! We were also asked not to write anything on facebook about it....so I'm not, just on my blog :)

I didn't really want to give up sweets again and although I thought about giving up drinking alcohol I didn't really feel like that was doing much for God. I did recognize, however, that I've been under a lot of stress at work recently and it was manifesting itself in different ways. I've always been an emotional eater, I definitely take out my stress by being short with people I love (learned/inherited that one from my mom-thanks....), and working out normally takes care of any other concerns. For really the first time in my life, however, I had consecutive weeks with nearly sleepless nights because my brain couldn't shut off no matter what I did. Dan had to lull me to sleep by reciting FAA regulations one night and two other nights I finished entire books between the time I got into bed around 10:30 and the time I feel asleep around 1 and 3, respectively.

Tying together my recent literary adventure, my inability to decide what to give up for Lent, and new ways of showing stress, I was inspired to do some research on what the Bible says about the body. One passage stuck out to me, and in the end inspired me to make a decision on what to do for the next forty days:

"Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body."(1 Corinthians 6: 19-20)

Now I'm not entirely certain how I feel about that whole price thing, but that passage is a reminder to me that my body is only on loan to me for a period of time and I need to treat it well otherwise it will fail me. My personal mission for Lent then is a combination of both adding and removing habits in my daily life. As I replied to Allison's email, I'm going to find alternatives to body-harming ways of coping with stress. For me, that means less emotional eating, less drinking, and (hopefully) fewer sleepless nights. Instead, I'm making an effort to attend church, go to a yoga class, and run every week. I'm praying these are habits that I can continue with long past March 31st, guess we'll just have to see!

A League of My Own

Secret New Years resolution is to blog twice a month...just barely making my deadline with this one! Blogs on the 1st and 30th...sorry readers, I'll try to do better.

My new catchphrase as of this month is "I wish I were still an ECD". From the time I started working at Aon in July 2011 until December 31st, 2012, I was part of a rotational early career development program. There were certainly some things I didn't love about it-lack of ownership, being called an intern...but along with that came little responsibility, and the responsibility I did have was short-term. The work hours were also a lot shorter. Now there is a list of 150+ things with my name as the owner and if they don't all happen on August 5th I'm in trouble! If I were still an ECD, I'd have rolled off the project in December or coming up in June and the outcome wouldn't matter so much, to me at least. It's definitely taken some getting used to, but it will be awesome to see the project through to the end, assuming it all works out okay.

Other than more responsibility at work, I've also taken on additional responsibilities with Big Shoulders Fund, the nonprofit board I'm involved with. I joined the auxiliary board last February and joined the schools committee. I was asked in December to take on a leadership role in the schools committee as the sub-committee chair for school involvement and mentors. My goal is to organize a group to attend events at 3 or more of our partner schools this year-something like a fundraiser, school play, or basketball game. I'm really excited about the additional responsibility and it puts me on track to take on greater leadership responsibilities in the group in the future.

I attended my first auxiliary board leadership meeting last week. The attendees included committee and subcommittee chairs and the auxiliary board executive leadership. Its a group of about fifteen mid-late 20 and early 30-somethings from all different backgrounds. Some currently or formerly worked in education (including a couple of TFA alums), others are in the financial industry, others in nonprofit organizations. Many have advanced degrees and others serve on several associate boards. Overall, a very well-connected, responsible, together group of people. The one thing that most of us seemed to be missing? Wedding rings. In fact there were 2 in the entire room.

Admittedly, this is a recent obsession of mine-seeing who is married (I know 10 people who got engaged in a 2 week span so forgive me for being highly observant). I noticed a similar trend in the sorority alumni group events I've attended in the past couple months. Lots of successful, well-adjusted women in the same age range (sorority girls even!). Lots of boyfriends, very few rings.

I feel like an anomaly all of a sudden. I've been slowly catching onto this idea for awhile, but its finally hitting me. Maybe it is weird that I'm a 24 year old woman who has a steady job with opportunities to advance yet relatively manageable work hours, I'm in a stable relationship with a pretty well-defined future, I live independently of my parents, I attend church most Sundays, I'm involved in many activities outside of work, I go the to gym regularly, I see my family at least once a month, I am preparing to go back to school, and I am at least progressing on the friend front. There has definitely been a lot less bar time in the past 8 months and maybe less free time than I'd ideally like, but its nothing that I didn't expect. I guess where I see myself in 5 or 10 years is in a very different place than my auxiliary board and alumni sorority sisters are right now. Granted, plans don't always work out that way which I'm slowly but surely learning about. Maybe in 5 years I'll be the one without the ring, piecing together odd jobs or working 60 hours a week. Or maybe I'll be in the complete opposite end deciding to put my career on hold to take care of my 2.5 children, dog, and cat in a house in a development in Joliet. Both of those thoughts make me shudder a little, although this article made my morning: http://www.thesuburbanjungle.com/15-tips-to-help-moms-survive-in-the-suburban-jungle

I'm not trying to hold judgement on anyone who is in a different place than I imagine myself to be in 5-10 years, but just wondering what I need to be doing differently now so that I continue to make progress towards where I want to be. I guess its just a new take on the classic "can I have it all?" question. Wonder what the answer will be for me!

A Look Back at 2012

Because I'm an overachiever (okay, really because I like lists), I not only made New Year's Resolutions last year but also followed those up a list of objectives for self-improvement. Although I didn't necessarily give these all a lot of thought throughout the year, I did a pretty good job in what I set out to do. Lets see how I measure up!

New Years Resolutions:
1. Puke less than once a month from drinking too much-successful! Hasn't happened once since the night before Dan moved in, how nice! Not going to cigar club has certainly helped that resolution out quite a bit! Trying to learn to remember to eat dinner before I go out as well

2. Weigh 130lbs on December 31st-Well, this is my own ultimate failure. I will say that according to the healthcare test I did for work, I didn't gain, or lose, any weight this year. So it could be worse since living with Dan has definitely had a negative affect on the health of my diet. But, I'm trying to remind myself to be grateful for the body that I have because it has done amazing things for me this year--like finish 10 miles in the Chicago Perfect 10--something I never thought I'd be able to do!

3. Have $5000 in my general savings account on December 31st-Achieved and surpassed a little on my own, and a lot considering I sold my car yesterday as well. Now I get to spend some time figuring out how/where I want to invest the money to save for grad school, a down payment, or perhaps a wedding.

Objectives for Self-Improvement: 
1. Effectively and efficiently complete 6 hours of work per day, 5 days a week- For those of you who know that I work 40 hour weeks, this probably seems a little suspicious. However, I will tell you that there was more than 1 week during my first rotation at Aon that I wasn't working even 1/4 of the time I should have been, which unfortunately isn't an all together uncommon experience in the ECD program, at least in IT. I am happy to say that despite a few dead weeks at the beginning of my second rotation, I have been much busier this past year and very happy for that!

2. Complete ITIL certification-this was a requirement (perhaps a loose requirement at best) for the ECD program which I am happy to say I completed at the end of August (or maybe beginning of September, don't really remember) this year!

3. Find 5 leadership opportunities both inside/outside of work- I surpassed this goal within months of making it, and didn't even have to try very hard to do so. This year I joined the alumni chapter of Alpha Chi Omega and took on the role of Assistant VP Programming. I also joined the Communications Committee at the Union League Club. I increased my role with the University of Richmond Alumni Recruitment Committee to serve as the Regional Co-coordinator after my friend Alison left the city for grad school. At work I created the IT development plan for the new ECD class alongside my mentor. My biggest leadership commitment in the past year and continuing on to next year though is through Big Shoulders Fund. I joined the Auxiliary Board in February and started participating in the schools committee right away. I also participated in 4 and led 2 of our Give Back Days which has been one of my favorite parts of Big Shoulders-and recruited 4 new participants for our October one! Next year I've been asked to serve as a sub-committee chair for volunteers and mentors as part of my committee and am also hoping to start a college counseling program in some of our high schools to encourage students to apply to more elite schools outside of the state like the University of Richmond.

4. Make 2 consistent new friends-definitely not one of my easiest goals but I think that meeting Colleen and Rachel this year allow me to check it off the list. Although Rachel and I haven't actually seen each other in literally months, we do gchat on almost a daily basis, since we're in similar fields we understand each other's work complaints like few others do! Colleen and I met at the Union League club and have spent a lot of time together in the past month-looking forward to more time together in 2013 as we train for the Rock 'N Roll Half Marathon (note: Colleen this means you have to do it!! Official because its in the blog!!)

5. Lose 15lbs-as discussed above, this did not happen. There's always next year, haha

6. Become more disciplined-eh, questionable for sure. But one thing I did this year which really helped me understand myself was doing a short course (for lack of better word through church) called Strengths for the Journey. In this I retook a Gallup administered strengths test which I took as part of a leadership conference my junior year of college. As part of a small group through St. Clements Church, we discussed our strengths through more of a Catholic lens. My top strengths were as follows: focus, learner, analytical, responsibility, input. If nothing else, this exercise assured me that I'm in the right career path, haha. No people skills=I definitely wouldn't have made a good teacher! So it took me awhile to get my head around the fact that having focus as a strength didn't mean I am necessarily disciplined-they are actually separate strengths. Focus is having an endpoint in mind, discipline is the ability to get there. So I guess its something I can continue working on in 2013 and probably the rest of my life.

7. Wake up without hitting the snooze button-I did this consistently for spurts of 2012, but I will say that I've become excellent at it on days when I'm waking up to get to a 6am class at the gym and, when I was training for the Chicago Perfect 10, was also good at it for my running mornings. I'm also better when Dan has already left for work and there's no one to snuggle with, haha. But I know I am capable of it, so I'm proud of that.

8. Integrate my post-college life with my relationship-this one hasn't been easy and I definitely wouldn't say I've been perfect but I'm trying. Its been difficult to spend time with my friends and away from Dan if it means I'm literally leaving him alone by himself on a Saturday night. I feel guilty about the fact that he doesn't really have any friends in the city besides his brother-his good friends from high school are still in Oak Park and everyone he works with lives in the far south/southwest suburbs so doesn't make it easy to hang out on the weekends. I'll keep working towards this goal, but its gone better than expected so far.

9. Buy new jeans-check, love LOFT even more than I already did

10. Find my niche at the Union League Club-still working on this one. Joining the Communications Committee helped me feel more like a member, although they're not really people I'll seek out at events to chat with. However, I am still striving to become better friends with some of the younger members. At one point this year I had 4 pretty solid ULC friends but after 1 moved and 1 quit, that left 2. We'll see what this next year brings! I have until September before my dues go up so that might require a decision to determine if its the best use of my time.

11. Cross one thing off my bucket list-I have several of these as well. One on pinterest, one general list that I started when I was in high school, and another "to do before I'm 30". I can definitely cross one item off the before I'm 30 list, as I've found a job that I enjoy going to at least 80% of the time. Actually, I think its more than 80% of the time. I don't always love what I'm doing at work, but I enjoy the people that I work with. Now that Dan's deserting me for Hewitt, I can't say that I'll see two of my closest friends on a daily basis, but at least I still have Laura (for now...) and plenty of other people I enjoy spending time with.

12. Read another "classic"-I created this goal with the knowledge that Pride and Prejudice became one of my all-time favorite books once I finally got through it (only took like 4 times starting it over about 3 years). I haven't completed another classic per say, but I did finish reading the Book of Genesis (another "to do before I'm 30 goal"=read the Bible) so I think that counts

13. Make my apartment feel like a home-moving in with Dan to a new apartment definitely made this happen for me. Instead of this massive apartment filled with random pieces of furniture that was somewhere in between college and real life, we now have a smaller apartment that, even if not expertly furnished, definitely seems more like a real person's apartment instead of a college one. The rule of nothing on the wall that's not framed certainly helps this!

14. Set a wedding date-well, this one didn't happen. But it was also the one most out of my control so I can't take full blame. Despite many inquires, there was no ring at Christmas nor during our very romantic New Year's Eve flight. Maybe this will become a 2013 resolution.

15. Get between 6.5-7 hours of sleep every night-officially not in college anymore and can't rely on mid-day naps to get me through! I wouldn't say I achieve this every night (some I slept more, others less) but on average I think its one to check off!

And I haven't come up with what my resolutions will be for 2013....weight loss and wedding date perhaps, probably could pretend I'm going to floss every night but I've been saying that for 10 years and it hasn't happened yet. So far I think my only resolution will be to take the GMAT. I promised myself that on January 1st I would either buy a wedding planning book or a GMAT prep book so onto amazon.com to search for study guides I go! Happy New Year to all!